Invisible Me

This poem is one of my favorites. I have it’s copyrights and I published it a few years ago. It was for my mother after she passed. I’ve shared it several times, changing up words when needed to relate to something or reach someone.

Everyone who follows me knows I relate life and Meniere’s/Vertigo to a boxing match. You are going to get hit. But, like Rockie said, “it’s about how many hits you can take and keep moving forward”. In life, with or without the disease, resting is fighting. I’ve said it before. You need to go to the corner and rest up before the next round. It’s vital to winning!

I wish I could help everyone. I’m always at ring side. But, sometimes you need that extra help. I relate therapist to your trainer in the match. The trainer is a professional and can help you learn better tactics so the opponents (life struggles) don’t keep stealing the win.

Yesterday, a friend got hit so hard because she thought she could fight alone for so long. Jordyn thought everything she felt would pass. It didn’t and she exploded. Life had beat her too badly while she was still swinging and missing. Jordyn decided to trust me and called a professional for help this morning. If you don’t stay balanced in the mind, you will lose the fight. It’s a fact. Don’t worry about judgement or what others will think. It takes a lot of courage to reach for that kind of help.

This wording of that poem was always her favorite read. She had mentioned it several times in the last month. I had no idea it was a cry for help as life and Meniere’s had led to suicidal thoughts she was hiding. Now, it makes complete sense to me. Although this piece was already published in one of my stories, I am publishing it out again with a few changes in honor of all who have struggled with these thoughts.

(Mentalhealth.gov gives really good detailed imformation if you or someone who love has reached this point.)

INVISIBLE ME

Please turn around…
For the greatest high I ever had was the lowest ground my soul ever crawled.

Please turn around…
For I climb to the bottom of darkness of pain, searching for the light of what I never lost.

Please turn around…
For I’m shivering in the warmth of the forgotten memory of what never was.

Please turn around…
For I’m screaming the dead silence in a crowded space of countless time.

Please turn around…
For I can touch the numbness of the beating heart that breaks long before mended pieces.

Please turn around…
For blinded eyes stair at the unforeseen sight of binding ties to finally set me free.

Please turn around…
For the biggest demon I ever fought were the ones that made me comfortable with who I never was.

*Life and MD thought it knocked me out one day. It didn’t know I was napping off the unbalance. I was just preparing for a better day tomorrow. I was also resting my thoughts to change my thinking to the positivity we need.

#thinkdeeper #letitout

#get backtopositive #changyourthinking #reachforhelp

(Thanks to my daughter who took the picture while I slept and suggested mommy share it with her writing)